trust without borders

Haiti, A challenge of trust

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I had the great opportunity to speak at youth group this past Sunday. I always love the
opportunity to share, especially with young people. That’s one reason I wanted to be a youth leader to begin with. Though, I have to admit that being a 40 something in a room full of people half your age is always an interesting adventure. But anyway, I digress.

When praying about what to share, I heard one word. Trust. Trusting God in all things, not just the things that make us comfortable or that are easy to share. Now I know that is much easier to say than to do, and all we can do is our best to trust. It truly is a journey in our walk with Christ to learn to trust. Sometimes it starts small with a simple request and then grows into larger areas. I encouraged the young men and women there to just start with one thing to trust God with this summer. Just one thing. We can all do that right?

Then I shared how my year started out with an announcement in our church of a Haiti mission trip. Two of my kids wanted to go and I was excited for them. But I’m not called to missions was my thought.  I just knew I wasn’t going. Then since many of our youth are going and I am a leader, I started having people ask if I was going. My reply. No, I’m not called to missions. A few more weeks go by, and more people ask if I’m going to Haiti. This time when I say no, I hear God say….. So. You’re not going to Haiti? But you didn’t even ask me. Well then, I say okay God, do you want me to go to Haiti? Much to my surprise, his answer was yes, I want you to go to Haiti. Well, my brain started spinning. I’ve never even traveled out of the country, less on to a place like Haiti. I will admit it. This put me beyond my comfort zone, I was down right scared.

But God is always stretching us, and even since I was a teenager, I have prayed for God tonever stop growing me. If others can trust God for missions, then so can I. The first thing that had me worried was the funds. I had talked to several people and they said just ask people to help. So that is exactly what I did and for the first few weeks funds started to roll in. But there were three of us going. It was a good amount of money to raise. I am a planner and had hoped the money would come in long before it was due. Of course that is not the way that it happened. Five days before money was due, we were still down about eight to nine hundred dollars. Well, the last two days we had four more sponsors and that took us over our goal. I had been worried, but chose to trust God not only for the provision but also for the timing. He came through.

Well today we are one week out. We leave Saturday, June 21st. I’m still way out of my comfort zone and feel very nervous, but I am trusting God with all my might. I trust him to provide all that I need, both financially, and now emotionally, mentally and especially spiritually. I know I will never be the same and look forward to the new me on the other side. With so many problems that we face, truly God is the only one with the answers. My friends what do you need help with today, this week, this year? Can you be like the young people in my youth group? Can you pick at least one thing to trust God with right now in your life? Give God a try. What do you have to lose?

Blessings to you my friends. Please pray for out Haiti team leaving June 21 and coming back June 28. And a very special thank you to all of our sponsors and prayer partners that have come along aside me and my children for this adventure at hand.

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Trust Without Borders

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I recently heard a song at Morningstar that hit me hard. One of the lines is “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders”. I could dwell and sink into that one line for ages. Where my trust is without borders. Wow! I want to walk in that place. In a place where deep calls unto deep and where my faith is without borders because my trust is in the one who knows all, owns all, and made all. I want to trust you like that Father God. Lead me there. I want to walk on the water because I am heading toward you. Help me, Lord, keep my eyes on you so that I don’t sink. Help me, Lord, hearken to your voice every step along this path of mine. Thank you Lord for loving me.

Some of the lyrics to that song:

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

I will call upon Your name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in Your embrace
I am Yours and You are mine

Slient wave

Letting Go

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At the beginning of the year God told me I needed to let go of the “how” and my own plans. His plans were better for me. Now, that is hard for me. I’ve always been a “how” kind of girl and a true planner. I plan things like vacation months in advance. The actual planning is part of the fun for me. But. (One small little word that changes the direction of things.) But, I want God’s plans for my life. I know his plans are so much better. All of this got me thinking. How many times do we miss out because we plan everything instead of letting the spirit lead us? How often do we let our own thoughts and anxieties take over the very thoughts that God gave us. How many times do we try and take His call on our lives into our own hands. He has laid out our steps. We just need to follow. Day by day.

Learning to take things day by day, and step by step is really hard for me. I imagine it is hard for most of us. If you are like me, I have often tried to negotiate with God for a 5 year plan. However I have come to realize that sometimes if he actually gave it to us, we would not be able to either handle it or believe him. Most often God’s plans are so big, we may not be able to wrap our brains around what he has for us in the next five years. When I was newly married at 21, I think I would have freaked out a little bit if God would have told me I was going to have 3 kids in the next five years and countless trials and tribulations. When I was 30, if God had told me I would have another child and start two businesses I think I would have been intimidated. If he would have let me know that a few years later I would start a career in Real estate, I would have tried to figure it all out on my own. So many times we ask for something and we don’t have any idea what it would be like if God actually answered in that moment.

This brings me full circle to today. In 2007, God placed a love in my heart for Hatteras Island. At the time I prayed and asked God for an answer for why I felt so connected to that area. He didn’t answer. I sat in a cafe, on the Pamlico Sound, with tears in my eyes and didn’t understand why he wouldn’t just tell me. Today I understand. As I sit in the same cafe 7 years later I understand. It was too big to show me then. The seeds needed to grow roots. And even though I still don’t have the complete picture, I understand. It had to be God’s timing. I needed to wait and to be led by the spirit.

I’m still learning, but I am giving it my all. Laying down my own plans and my own strategies for his. I am trusting that he has the answers. I’m letting him lead me week by week, day by day, or even as a good friend of mine recently said half hour by half hour. That’s all I can do. The rest is up to him and there is such peace in that. His plans are better and I am excited now about letting go of the how and my own plans.