trusting God

The 16 Year Old Me

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Life is a journey

I’m often surprised in life with how things happen in ways that I never expected. For most of my life I have been a planner. In fact, by the time I was 16, I had my whole life planned out. I wonder how many of us do that? In Sunday school this week our Senior High students got to finish up a series on Godly Career Development with a panel of church members. Listening to them share their stories, I found myself chuckling at the way we, as people, try to figure our whole lives out when God has other plans for us. None of them had their lives turn out as they has planned as teenagers. It made me think about a recent visit at my parent’s house.

For Christmas we stayed a couple of days with my parents. We were reminiscing about Christmases gone by and how the years go by so fast. My dad was talking about how I am still his “little girl” when I now have two adult children of my own. He talked about his childhood and things he had hoped for and how happy he was to have grandkids. He told me he was proud of my husband and I for how we had raised our kids and thought we had done a good job. It was a wonderful time of fellowship for our family and got me to thinking about how all of the good things in my life are because of The Lord.

In that moment, I thought about my past plans and things I had strived for. The things that I had tried to make happen. I thought of the things I had done wrong and the things I had done right. I thought about how I had my life planned out at 16, leaving little room for God to make changes. I wondered what the 16 year old me would think if she could see her life now. I imagine she would be scared, happy and have her little mind blown.  Some of things she planned did happen. I have a great husband, children and a strong walk with the Lord, however, I don’t think any of it happened the way she thought it would. I think she would be very surprised at how it is all better than she could have ever imagined. As I thought about the 16 year old me, and who I am today, I was left mostly in awe of how God’s plans are always the best. Because all the things I have done right are really the times that I listened to the Lord, trusted him, and let him lead the way. And the things that I had done wrong, well, He has come in and cleaned up my mess. If I could go back and talk to the 16 year old me, I would tell her to trust more in God’s plan and His goodness. I would tell her how much she needs Him in her life. I would tell her that His plans are always the best ones and if she thinks her plans are better she is sadly mistaken. Because I have had the chance to walk in my own plans and have been left to my own devices. That woman, that person, is not a pretty one. She is a mess. But with God, she can be pretty amazing. Because everything I have I owe to Him, everything I am I owe to Him, and everything I want to be in the future I give to Him, because He is trustworthy. In this life I have learned what a mess I am without Christ, but how with Him I can be used in great ways, as a wife, as a mom, as a friend, and as the Lords hands and feet. Pretty amazing that God wants to use us no matter how small we are, no matter how selfish we have been, and no matter what we have done.

So I guess I am left with telling the present day me to, trust God. Trust in His plans and in His goodness. Trust that He has a perfect plan and that He already has all the answers. Know that He loves more than can be measured and holds all things in His hands. Yes, that is what I would tell myself and it’s what I am telling you. Be Blessed my friends.

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Redwoods

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This spoken word is so beautiful. Spiritual community is about needing and depending on each other. We are better together. I hope you enjoy this spoken word. Be blessed my friends.

A Shawdow Of A Doubt

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This week’s Poetry Tuesday is a powerful spoken word by Joseph Solomon. This spoken word is incredible and has me thinking of my own doubts and fears and what God’s truth says about them. Take a few minutes to watch my friends and then ask yourselves; Do I have a backpack of fear? What are my questions and doubts? Then together let’s lean on the one with all the answers. Let’s open our ears and mustard up just a little bit of faith and courage. And let’s doubt our doubts together. Be blessed my friends.

 

Did You Feel The Mountains Tremble

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This week’s Poetry Tuesday feature is Did You Feel The Mountains Tremble by Delirious? I have always loved this song. Listening to this song is one of the first times I remember The Lord giving me a vision. It was a vision of the Body of Christ in my city coming together and reaching the nations. I love the lyrics and the message… that there is power in unity. I love the live version that I shared below. So my friends be blessed and let’s sing together.

Did You Feel The Mountains Tremble

Did you feel the mountains tremble?
Did you hear the oceans roar?
When the people rose to sing of
Jesus Christ, the risen one

Did you feel the people tremble?
Did you hear the singers roar?
When the lost began to sing of
Jesus Christ, the saving one

And we can see that God you’re moving
A mighty river through the nations
And young and old will turn to Jesus
Fling wide you heavenly gates
Prepare the way of the risen one

Open up the doors and let the music play
Let the streets resound with singin’
Songs that bring Your hope and
Songs that bring Your joy
Dancers who dance upon injustice

Do you feel the darkness tremble
When all the saints join in one song?
And all the streams flow as one river
To wash away our brokenness

And here we see that God, you’re moving
A time of jubilee is coming
When young and old return to Jesus
Fling wide you heavenly gates
Prepare the way of the risen Lord

Open up the doors and let the music play
Let the streets resound with singin’
Songs that bring Your hope and
Songs that bring Your joy
Dancers who dance upon injustice

And we can see that God, you’re moving
A time of jubilee is coming
When young and old return to Jesus
Fling wide you heavenly gates
Prepare the way of the risen Lord, yeah, yeah

Open up the doors and let the music play
And let the streets resound with singin’
Songs that bring Your hope and
Songs that bring Your joy
Dancers who dance upon injustice

Open up the doors and let the music play
And let the streets resound with singin’

Hope for Haiti

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This week I have had Haiti on my mind. More appropriately, the people of Haiti. See the thing is, when I decided to go to Haiti on a mission trip, I had no idea what to expect. When I got there nothing could have prepared me for what I would see. Flying into Haiti, you could see all the small temporary housing. To be honest, I cried right there on the plane. Then when we got off the plane and made our way out of the airport I was struck by the need here in this country. By the dusty desolation.

But then, driving along the dusty road, I saw a thriving green vine growing in an old building. It had beautiful crimson flowers. The mountains rose in the background and the beautiful Caribbean waters were just by the road. Beauty among desolation is what I felt. The people had their market stands set up all along the road. They were beautiful too. I felt thankful for all that I had back at home but I was also thankful to be here in this place. A little boy waved at me as we drove by and my heart was full of hope. Full of hope for Haiti.

As the week went by, I met many Haitians of all ages. I fell in love. The people of Haiti are strong, beautiful and welcomed me with open arms and hearts abandoned. I walked hand and hand with children almost everywhere I went. I spoke very little Creole and most of the people spoke little English but we communicated far beyond what words could say. We laughed, talked as much as we could, played games, and learned from each other. By the end of the week, I felt I had made many new friends. Several Haiti women had told me they loved me and I said I loved them too. The last day in the village I walked with a little girl and boy along the way. I had seen them several times during the week. The little boy was probably about 6, just a few years younger than my youngest child. When it was time to get on the bus, I told the children goodbye. As I looked out the window, there was the little boy looking back at me. I realized I would probably never see him again. Once again I cried. It was hard. It was wonderful. Going to Haiti changed me forever. Today I am thinking of all my friends in Haiti. I pray for them. I hope to see them again someday. And I have a great amount of hope for Haiti. Hope for Haiti, today and forevermore.

10489847_10204373046512205_4924344564112307017_n Me and Princess

The Future and the Past

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I love John Mark McMillan. Writer, singer, poet. This weeks Poetry Tuesday is a song off his new album. Future Past. Such a beautiful, wonderful and beautiful thought and feeling that God is our future and our past. Be blessed my friends.

Future / Past

You hold the reins on the sun and the moon
Like horses driven by kings
You cover the mountains, the valleys below
With the breadth of Your mighty wings

All treasures of wisdom and things to be known
Are hidden inside Your hand
And in this fortunate turn of events
You ask me to be Your friend
You ask me to be Your friend

And You,
You are my first
You are my last
You are my future and my past
[x2]

The constellations are swimming inside
The breadth of Your desire
Where could I run, where could I hide
From Your heart’s jealous fire

All treasures of wisdom and things to be known
Are hidden inside Your hand
And in this fortunate turn of events
You ask me to be Your friend
You ask me to be Your friend

And You,
You are my first
You are my last
You are my future and my past
[x2]

You are the beginning and the end [x3]

And You,
You are my first
You are my last
You are my future and my past
[x3]